I’m floating with the birds. I’m talking to the weeds Look what you’ve done to me I’m still dressed up from the night before Silken hose and an old Parisian coat And I feel like a queen at the bus stop on the street Look what you’ve done to me It’s a beautiful morning in the ghetto Finer than the day before The ants are crawling over my pants as if to say They know where the honey is There’s really old roses blooming in the ghetto Birds of paradise are taller than me The weeds grow high, the birds flicker by Children are walking to school In the midst of all of this profusion The bus pulls up to take me back home The bus driver looks like an African prince The babies have tears in their eyes And I feel like a queen On this sunny city bus Look what you’ve done to me
10 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT WOMEN, BY JENNA FISCHER
1. If we run into your ex-girlfriend in public, the first thing you should do is put your arm around us. And if we have to introduce ourselves, you’re in big trouble.
2. When you tell us about a business lunch you had with a woman, it’s a good idea to tell us she’s fat, ugly, old, or a lesbian. Preferably all of them.
3. PMS is real. It’s chemical and it sucks. If someone told you that every thirty days you were going to get jacked repeatedly in the nuts, you’d be pissy around day 26, too.
4. When we say “I don’t feel connected,” the appropriate response is “I feel it too. Let’s go out for a nice dinner and reconnect.” Try it. You will get laid.
5. If you can locate the following items in our home—tape, casserole dish, Christmas ornaments—you will get laid.
6. If you act excited about the bath mat we bought at Target, you will get laid.
7. We really want to have kids. That is, until you want to have kids. Then: “Hey, slow down. What about my career? It’s my body. I’m not just a depository for your sperm, you know. Fuck off. Wait, come back. I’m sorry about that. It’s sweet you want to have kids. Let’s talk about it in a year.”
8. You know what’s really gay? Football. Instead of watching it, just have sex with another dude once a year. Get it all out of your system at once.
9. We can make a “celebrity safe list” if you want. But I’m way more likely to get Patrick Dempsey to fuck me in a bathroom than you are to get Lindsay Lohan to suck you off in your car.
10. Okay, wait. Maybe not Lindsay Lohan. But you know what I mean.
Has anyone
ever told you
that you
wear your tears
like jewelry
in a way no woman
ever has?
-Tyler Knott Gregson-
written by: allthingsc
Mama said there’d be days like this and oh, what a day it was.
It started with promise - the early morning dedicated to a jog through the city, catching glimpses of the rising sun behind mammoth glass and steel towers. I was prepared to conquer the world.
Somehow…
look up at the strange and beautiful sky
how the sun shines
how the clouds cry
leaving tear drops on fragile petals
on the gifts of time
I ne’er thought I’d see the day
When love would ‘gain find a way
Into my life and through my soul
Warming up my heart so cold.
You came in like a cool spring breeze,
Bringing with it all the melodies
Of a life of love and faith and fate
And a relationship devoid of hate.
For…
